Those Pointy Things You Keep in Your Mouth

30 Dec

I went to the dentist recently and to my surprise it wasn’t an incredibly unpleasant experience. Not that going to the dentist has ever been really terrible, mind you, this visit was just, well, shorter than normal. She didn’t put anything terribly gross on my teeth or spend a lot of time scraping or anything so it wasn’t too bad. It helped that I didn’t have to sit and wait for one of my siblings to go first either. I just went in, got it done and then I left. Very simple.

I didn’t have the usual girl, though, which was kind of a bummer since I really like the normal person who cleans my teeth. That sounds weird but she’s a very nice lady. She knows what I like, always complements me on my hats and asks about my school, which can be awkward when you’re in the middle of getting your teeth cleaned but that’s kind of their job. Anyway this new girl was younger I think and actually paused so that I could answer rather than just talking with her hands in my mouth. That was nice but she said something really funny that I really wasn’t expecting.

The comment she made was “Have you ever had braces?” This in itself is not terribly funny. It’s a fairly common question and the answer is, no I haven’t had braces. I indicated such and she responded with “You have really nice teeth.” This is the funny part. Every dentist I have ever seen in my entire life since I was about six has told me that I needed braces. Every time I went in they would ask, “Have you ever considered braces?” And the answer would be “no, I ruined my teeth so my dad won’t get them for me.” That makes it sounds really bad, actually, let me explain. It wasn’t that I ruined my teeth and that was my punishment, though it would be fitting and maybe less of a punishment as I hear they are rather uncomfortable things to have. I couldn’t get braces because I sucked my thumb for a very long time and there was no point to getting me braces until I quit. By the time I finally did quit it was pretty much pointless to get them anyway so it just never happened. Now that that side note is out of the way, you can see how funny I found it after years of being told I needed braces when this woman told me I have beautiful teeth.

I suppose she could be referring to the general health of my teeth. I’ve always had healthy teeth, if not very straight ones. I’ve only had one cavity in my life and it was very small. They didn’t even numb my jaw to fill it, they just went in and fixed it up and sent me on my way. This bit I’ve always found a bit odd seeing as my family doesn’t necessarily have a history of good teeth. My brother’s teeth are too close together or something like that and he’s had his share of cavities and probably mine too. My sister likewise hasn’t had the best of luck with her teeth, especially when she was little. She has several caps and fillings and so on. It was so bad when she was little she would cry when she ate a cookie because her mouth hurt, which was awful considering she loved cookies. And then there’s me. I was the one who needed braces but never got them and had no cavities to speak of. I’m also the first one to get her wisdom teeth taken out.

My brother is due to have his out sometime though whether or not they’ve gotten around to scheduling that yet I have no idea. I got mine done when it was cool apparently to get your teeth removed from your jaw as probably 50% of my friends had theirs done the same year. This was not necessarily comforting seeing as one of my friends woke up in the middle of hers and had a panic attack, naturally, resulting in a cut lip. Yeah, I heard all sorts of horror stories about getting your teeth taken out. Luckily I didn’t hear anything about it being a possibly fatal surgery, as all surgeries technically are, until afterward or I’d have been really freaked out. It was the first and only surgery I’ve ever had. My brother is also a jerk. Have I told you guys that yet? He is. He acts all nice and sweet, helping me to bed while I’m all drugged up and can barely walk, giving me pillows, letting me use his laptop… turning his webcam on for own personal drugged up use… Not a good idea, using a webcam to make a video when you’re high on drugs. You will be extremely embarrassed later and all your friends will laugh at you. The worst part is it’s still out there. Nii-chan put it up on Youtube and Facebook so that the whole world would see it. I deleted it from Facebook but I’m pretty sure it’s still floating around Youtube somewhere. Luckily it has the most generic name ever so you’ll never find it! EVER!

Wow, that went on much longer than I thought it would. Huh. Well I could tell you all about pulling my teeth out when I was little, how I kept loosing teeth well into the sixth grade, or about my dad’s front tooth that falls out every couple of years, but I think you’re done with my teeth stories for now. So I will let you go now and do other far more important things, like taking care of those teeth you have in your mouth. Remember, they’re the only ones you get.

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Posted by on December 30, 2011 in Rants


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